In an interview with PAGE ONE, Linda Crockett, director of the Center's new program on family violence and award winning author of The Deepest Wound: How a Journey to El Salvador Led to Healing from Mother-Daughter Incest, talks about writing, healing and the cultural conditions that allow sexual abuse to flourish. Following the interview, Linda shares her perspective and enthusiasm for Walking Together: Support for Survivors of Family Violence, the new program she directs.

1. Why did you write THE DEEPEST WOUND?

It started as a part of my own healing journey, not even thinking about publication. But as I worked, I began to feel the spirits of other victims around me, those who were murdered by their abusers or who slowly killed themselves through drugs, prostitution and other forms of suicide. I was corresponding with survivors from the U.S. and Europe who were silenced by shame, carrying guilt that rightfully belonged to the perpetrators. Most did not comprehend that what happened to them was part of a much larger social and cultural problem. Children who are tortured within their own homes share common ground with political prisoners and survivors of Nazi death camps. Yet their pain is privatized. There are no public mourning rituals for a lost childhood, or monuments to commemorate the courage and resilience of the victims. I gradually realized as one who had been lucky enough to survive and heal, I had a responsibility to speak. And that what I had to say about the violence that takes place within some middle class American families was important.

2. What does it take to be a survivor?

There are no easy answers as to why some survive and others do not. Many researchers believe that the ability to dissociate, compartmentalize, and create an imaginary world in which one is safe is a common characteristic of those who manage to survive long term trauma. I believe that one of the keys is to never give up hope, to hold on to some small spark of yourself even when all those around you seek to extinguish it. Another is honoring whatever form of resistance helped you to survive. For example, dissociation was a form of resistance for me. When the pain of the abuse became too intense, I left my body and flew away in my mind. Years later, I engaged in bodywork as a form of healing. Whenever old trauma was triggered by the massage, I immediately went limp, pale, and my breathing slowed to almost nothing. My therapist said it was as though my spirit fled my body. Unfortunately, one does not stop dissociating when the trauma is over. As an adult, I had to let go of my pattern of dissociating as a response to any perceived danger because now it negatively impacted my life. But I let it go slowly, and gave thanks for this merciful gift that helped me to survive.

3. What advice can you offer someone who has been abused but doesn't know what to do?

What happened to you was not your fault. You were a child, totally dependent on the goodwill of the adults you trusted and loved. Your abuser may have twisted the truth to make you believe you were responsible. You may have been told that if your body responded with pleasure it was "proof" that you wanted the abuse. This is a lie. Our bodies are created to respond in certain ways to sexual stimulation. Your body did not betray you. It was simply responding to a selfish manipulation by an adult who used you for gratification of perverse desires.

That being said, the next most important thing is this: get help. Find a good therapist. Few people are able to work through the pain alone. Nor should you have to. You deserve all the help and support you can get. Don't believe family or friends who say you should just "get over it". Don't give up if the first person you turn to doesn't work out. Keep searching. Healing is incredibly hard but it's worth it. Until you see the beauty of the world without the fog of past trauma clouding your vision, you cannot even comprehend what you are missing. You deserve to heal. If you managed to survive, you have the courage it takes. Courage does not mean you have no fear. It means you move forward, despite your fear.

4. You say you "want to be a healing path for other people." Please explain.

Healing from sexual abuse is like walking into the wilderness. There is no real map. However, there are footprints left by others who have gone this way before, and every so often we can follow their paths. Each time a survivor heals enough to speak out and share her story with the world, the imprint of her journey is left upon the terrain of our collective memory. The wilderness is not as terrifying if you can see these faint footprints, if you know that others have walked this way and survived. One reason that so many adults are now able to talk about their experiences of childhood sexual abuse is because the cultural, political, and social space has been opened by other survivors during the past two decades. If we don't keep widening the space for dialogue, those paths will slowly become overgrown with the weeds of societal denial and amnesia that always threaten disclosures of atrocities committed within the very institutions that are the foundation of our society, such as families and churches.

A complete version of this interview is available here.

I am very excited about Walking Together, and its potential to help adult survivors of childhood sexual trauma to heal, as well as prevent further abuse to children. It provides specialized training to medical, therapeutic and religious professionals on aspects of family violence that are not well resourced in the community, such as relationships with adult survivors and female sexual abuse of children. Sexual abuse is the "elephant" in our midst - one we tip-toe around but largely refuse to acknowledge. The cries of the victims are too often only heard by God. We need to open our ears and let those cries compel us to action on behalf of the "least ones".

For example, many clergy do not know how to create a climate of safety and acceptance within the parish to encourage victims to seek help and support. We teach them how to do that, as well as connect them with key local resources working to prevent family violence and assisting victims in healing. The program also raises awareness by sponsoring an annual conference. On October 24 - 25, Family Violence: The Hidden Terrorism will feature 3 keynote speakers and 11 workshops for professionals, survivors, advocates and the public. It's been amazing to me how many other non-profits, agencies, and businesses have joined with the Center to make this event possible. Clearly, we are reaching a point of realizing that the problem of family violence is not solely a medical, psychological, spiritual or personal issue for those experiencing it. It is a social issue that needs to be addressed from multiple angles by communities, survivors and professionals. Walking Together aims to do just that.