Answer: It depends. Coaching your daughter on her T-ball team can be a positive experience for both of you as long as you maintain realistic expectations about 8-year-olds playing team sports. They are out there to have fun and to learn how to play the game. To make that happen for your daughter - and the rest of her team - everyone needs equal playtime, regardless of their skill level. Showing favoritism to your daughter will not only give her the wrong message but will likely put her at odds with the rest of the team. Giving helpful feedback to your daughter and the rest of the team will improve their skills and self-confidence, but harsh criticism can be harmful to their self-esteem. A focus on cooperation, rather than winning, is your best bet for an All-Star season - at home and on the field.

Answer: You can request her school to give your daughter an evaluation (called a Multidisciplinary Evaluation or MDE) to determine if she has a learning disability and whether she may be eligible for special services. You will need to put this request in writing and send it to her school’s principal – and keep a copy for yourself. The school has 60 school days (not calendar days) from the date of your request to complete this evaluation. When the evaluation is complete, you must be provided with a copy of the report and have the opportunity to review the results with the school. If you have more questions, you may call the Special Education ConsultLine at 1-800-879-2301. A special education adviser can answer or direct your concerns to someone who can help you.

Answer: Yes. A learning disability in math can be attributed to several different underlying problems in brain functioning, such as spatial judgment, visual-motor skills, or non-verbal reasoning. Emotional factors, such as frustration, anxiety, or depression can inflate these difficulties. A more thorough evaluation of your son’s underlying brain functioning can help to uncover the reasons WHY he is having trouble with algebra and can generate recommendations to target those specific areas of weakness. This type of evaluation is called a neuropsychological evaluation. Your son’s guidance counselor or pediatrician should be able to refer you to a licensed psychologist with the necessary training in assessing brain functioning.

Answer: Babysitters can be hard to find, especially being new to an area without family and established friends. A first line approach to a babysitter may be asking neighbors who they use, and perhaps more important, who they don’t use. Some neighborhoods even organize babysitting “clubs” where parents take turns watching each others’ children for free. Other good sources of referrals can come from local churches, high school guidance counselors, day care centers, or pediatrician offices. It is a good idea to interview prospective babysitters to get a sense if they are a good fit for your family. Some questions you might ask are what kind of experience they have had, any formal babysitting training (such as through the American Red Cross), what age ranges they are experienced with, and how they handle children’s negative behavior. You might want to conduct your interviews with your children present to get a sense of how they interact. If you are interviewing adolescents, it may also be a good idea to have a brief phone contact with their parent(s) to get their input about their child’s level of responsibility, their availability if their child needs help while babysitting, and to also establish a sense of trust as their child’s employer. Finally, availability and fees are important to determine up-front. These ideas should get you off to a good start in finding a special person for your children during your “us” time.

Answer: There are some alternatives to reacting to your kids fighting. One option is preventing the physical fighting from happening. Sure, kids are going to disagree and get angry with each other, but intervening in the conflict before it escalates into a physical altercation is a valuable skill for parents. Some early signs you probably already know are loud voices, namecalling, red faces, and grabbing toys from each other. Once observed, you can intervene before the first fist flies or the first lock of hair is pulled, separate them until they cool down, talk to them about why they are angry, and help them re-engage in playing more cooperatively. This early intervention can go a long way in helping them learn how to regulate their own behavior. To further support the lesson you are trying to teach them, it will be important for you to reward their efforts when they resolve conflicts without hurting each other or are able to work cooperatively together, like cleaning up their toys or setting the table. A little praise and an ounce of prevention can go a long way to a more peaceful life.

Answer: A non-verbal learning disorder is a cluster of impairments in motor, sensory, visual-spatial, and social functioning. These impairments impact a child’s ability to learn to tie shoes or ride a bike, to tolerate classroom bells, to write or copy drawings from the board, and to read other people’s body language, tone of voice, and facial expressions (i.e., non-verbal communication). Children with non-verbal learning disorders cope with these impairments by relying upon verbal language. As a result, they often show an exceptional memory for factual material, talk their way through even minor problems, and are precocious readers with an extensive vocabulary. Academic difficulties are often seen in reading comprehension and math concepts, while math facts and spelling are above average. There is evidence of brain dysfunction in the right hemisphere of people with non-verbal learning disabilities, and neuropsychological testing often reveals slow processing speed and severe organizational deficits. These children’s left-brain strengths often precludes awareness of a learning disorder, so it is admirable that your son’s teacher may have identified a potential problem. The first step toward effective treatment is neuropsychological evaluation, which will identify your child’s areas of strength and weakness, and determine if he fits the profile of a child with a non-verbal learning disorder. Once correctly identified, recommendations might include a social skills group, writing readiness exercises, use of a pencil grip, and use of paper with columns to assist in keeping numbers aligned in calculations.

Answer: No. A learning disability means that your nephew is not reaching his full potential in school because he has difficulty with one or more specific skills. These skills may include handwriting, math calculation, word decoding, understanding social cues, organization, or verbal expression. If his school has already identified him as having a specific learning disability, they will be able to generate a list of supports to help him achieve important academic and social goals. This document is called an IEP, or an Individualized Education Plan.

Answer: While studying and feel well-prepared for a test is enough for most kids to be able to do their best, others like your daughter experience “test anxiety.” The best strategy in conquering this problem is breathing – she can learn to control her anxiety when it first starts to build by breathing in slowly through her nose to the count of “3” and exhaling even slower to the count of “5.” She will need to practice this before faced with a test, but once she is able to use it, she should feel a lot better.