What's to stop love from growing when there are strong roots embedded in rich soil, fresh air, plenty of sunshine, and yes, showers, too? Nothing. Which is good news, since healthy living depends on it, especially for children. Children rely primarily on their parents for love and nurturing. As it should be. But what about grandparents, aunts, uncles, godparents, cousins, adult siblings and close family friends - is their support worthwhile? Absolutely! Children love the attention. Parents love the break. And we all could use a good excuse to "play."

Children can benefit from the additional love and nurturing found in these often untapped resources. They get access to a "fresh" adult who doesn't have to endure the daily stressors of parenting. Although children may think they're just having fun, playing is actually a crucial ingredient of development. It's how children learn about the world, relationships and themselves. Play allows for safe exploration of new skills and interests with persons who can provide experiences that a child's parents may not enjoy or have time for, such as going on nature walks or bike rides, listening to different types of music, gardening, reviewing family albums and working on arts and crafts.

Parents are stressed now more than ever with trying to balance the demands of work and home. Most would welcome a break for an hour, an afternoon or a night out. At first glance, it might look like babysitting - but it is so much more. Having another responsible adult around who has a sincere concern about their child's welfare can be reassuring, especially for single parents and parents with special needs children. These relationships can also provide a safe environment for trial separations from parents by way of day excursions or sleepovers.

There are perks for the "back-up" adults as well. For instance, they get to go to animated movies, amusement parks, and play video games, laser tag, and hide and seek - things they may secretly enjoy but hesitate to do on their own at the risk of being seen as juvenile. While all grown-ups can benefit from playful forms of "letting go," the rewards may be even greater for those without children of their own. For example, those who have not yet started their own family can gain exposure to the reality of dealing with children, while those who have decided not to have children can gain a sense of passing on their values and life-perspectives to a new generation.

Some extended families are limited in their ability to interact due to geographic locations. Fortunately, there are still ways to stay connected and make an impact on each others' lives. Phone calls, cards, e-mail messages and holiday gifts can serve as reminders to children that someone across the miles cares about them. In return, videotaped special occasions and everyday activities can bring a child's experience closer to those adults.

And finally, two cautionary notes. First, remember that parents are the ultimate authority. Family and friends can give advice, but they need to respect parents' wishes. At the same time, while it is important for parents to communicate their rules and expectations to extended family members, some flexibility allows children permission to "be a kid." Second, beware of passing on family conflict to the newest generations. Children should be allowed to make their own decisions about extended family members as they mature. Patterns of conflict can also be inherited into current parent-child relationships. Addressing these issues is important for children to establish healthy relationships both now and in their future.

Now go have some fun!