How often have you fretted and agonized over making the Right decision and felt anxiety about the possibility of making a Wrong decision? Most of us are quite familiar with this scenario. We vacillate back and forth with fear of making a mistake, then paralysis sets in. We become unable to make any decision because we are consumed with the belief that somehow there is a Right decision and which decision it is eludes and escapes us.

Susan Jeffers in her book, Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway, describes ways to make a “no-lose” decision. She contends that there is no Wrong or Right decision. Rather we have been taught to be careful, to not act impulsively, so we believe that we will be doomed if we make a decision in which the outcome is different than predicted or planned for. Generally, a decision is deemed right or wrong based primarily on outcome. If the decision turns out to be lucrative, provides status, happiness and security then we say we have made the right decision. If however, the decision offers difficulties, challenges, speed bumps and loss, we pronounce it the wrong decision. We are filled with regret and fear that we will make another wrong decision and the cycle begins again.

To embrace the “no-lose” idea of decision making, we have to give up the notion that there is such a thing as a perfect outcome. We can develop the belief that we are equipped to handle whatever comes. This “no-lose” method for decision making states that every decision will offer opportunities to grow inner resources, meet new people, and experience new ways of being in life. There will be “goodies” with every decision. No matter the decision, there are always positive outcomes. The belief that we can handle the outcome frees us to approach decision making with less worry and trepidation.

The “no-lose” decision making idea is not about irresponsibility. When making a life changing decision, we do well to do the homework of becoming self aware and reflective, reviewing past experiences, gathering information, inviting counsel with friends, family or professionals, and weighing the changes each decision may have on life. However when decision time is at hand, choosing to believe in the “no-lose” principle can relieve us to proceed free of fear, or nearly so. Since we cannot predict outcomes, we can reframe our anxiety by believing we can handle what comes and that there will be challenges and blessings with any decision.

If the outcome is not what we expected or predicted, and we have clues in our life that we are off course, we can make course corrections. In the “no-lose” paradigm there is no room for shame in discovering that this course is not right for us. Knowing that we can handle the outcome and make the necessary corrections allows for growth in self confidence. What may seem like a mistake today can be the open door to something greater tomorrow.

Ms. Jeffers sums up the “no-lose” principle by admonishing us to “lighten up”. Knowing that all decisions provide opportunities and having the internal permission to change directions at any time will reduce the fear of making the wrong decision and is the ticket to making decisions that propel us toward a more fulfilling life path.